Friday, December 30, 2011

so this is happening

i like Paul, paul screwed up.

im moving, probably have less than 15 days here in sac, and I'd like to spend time with him...

and Steven is no longer anyone im worried about.

and pete from smrc likes me.... weird.

but johni and I are leaving on the 2nd to find a place to live. then back to sac on the 5th. gone for Chambers on the 10 going with arc till the 24th. then moving out and south by the 31st.

this is going to be madness

and im so excited =D

Saturday, December 24, 2011


as of this morning and yesterday, everytime i had a spare moment I've thought about paul.

just thinking about him makes me smile.

kinda sucks.

Monday, December 19, 2011


this whole move thing will probably break my heart. maybe Paul's too.

leaving me emotionally unavailable again

but hopefully I'll have a bunch of work when we move... if not... well it will be a sucky year.

=\ here goes nothing.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Sunday morning

its been decided, im moving with johni to j tree.

it's a good change. i should be getting on with chambers group, and hopefully with farwestern and asm.

i get to do archaeology. =) no more peets and no more state parks.

im super excited.... but im also a little sad about leaving sacto and Paul. but there are more fish in the sea and hopefully we can keep in touch. oh well, better  now than father down the line when we're both more invested.

this is good.... i just have to keep telling myself that.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Saturday, December 10, 2011


he is this guy I met on pof...

totally random. i had a horrible profile, but I think I really like him. neither of us want to jump into a relationship and we are pretty much the same person. except he doesn't like the who. ha and he makes fun of my hipster tendencies.

we're also waiting to have sex cause both of us are over meaningless sex.

he has comitment issues and I have faithful issues..... so this did
should be good. ha

Saturday, December 3, 2011


I realized that I either need a steady flow of sex in my life, or I will continue to smoke. its either nicotine or sex. thats it.